At least us Jets fans have our pride

From Bill Simmons column today:

Bills (-1.5) over JETS
Here's an e-mail about Monday night's game from Doons (a good friend of my buddy J-Bug). I thought it summed up the Jets season:

"So I got tickets to the MNF game last night and sat in the front row behind the Pats bench on about the 20-yard line. The Jets firefighter guy was four rows behind me. Around the middle of the third quarter, after him screaming his head off since the start of the game … I had enough. So I got up (in full Damien Woody Pats gear), turned around and told him 'Can you please shut up and sit the (bleep) down, you've been on TV enough tonight already.' He came down and wanted to fight me, hilarious! He was screaming at me saying he could get the whole section to kick my ass and to shut my mouth, yelling so loud and head-butting me with his fire helmet, and there was spit spray coming out of his mouth hitting me in the face. I just kept laughing and told him to go back and sit on his buddy's shoulders. Security came over, broke it up and said although he was in the wrong, they couldn't kick him out because the Jets mandate he be there as their Super Fan."

(Ladies and gentlemen, the 2005 New York Jets!)

Thank you, Ed. You've left the rest of the country with certifiable evidence that many Jets fans suck as much as Jets players.

Best and Worst of 2005

With 2005 about to take it's last grasp, figured I'd summarize this year for posterity sake with some highlights and lowlights. For this, there really is no rhyme or reason, just some random ups and downs from this year including a few of my favorite things:

Best Movie: Batman Begins. I realize that this selection automatically places my serious movie clout into question, but considering the weakness of this year's crop (and my general avoidance of indies this year), this was a fairly easy choice. Great acting (except from Katie Holmes), great story and great execution. I doubt the Superman relaunch will be as successful, but I've always preferred Batmamn over Superman anyway.

Worst Movie: Kicking and Screaming. Not so much for the film itself, but for what it represents to Will Ferrell's career. After several awesome roles, he really didn't need to make this Bad News Bears ripoff. Hopefully, Mr. Ferrell will be a little more picky in choosing his roles from now on.

Best TV show: Family Guy. It's been on fire since it returned and it's just great to have it back on the air.

Worst TV show: The Simpsons and SNL. Two longtime favorites in the need of cancellation (the Simpsons) and a retooling (SNL). It's been painful watching both struggle.

Best Album/Worst Album: None. Honestly, music has by and large passed me by. I want to get back into it, but have just felt so detached from what's being put out there that I can't find a reason to bother. I bought I believe 7 cds this year and hardly listen to any of them.

Best gift (perhaps ever): My I-Pod mini. Completely changed how I listen to music. Words alone can't describe its awesomeness.

Best trip: My February New Orleans trip. Good food, gambling, drinking, great..um..entertainment and Lindsay Lohan. Plus beignets, which is French for crack.

Worst trip: Road trip to Roanoke. Mostly for the excessive driving and Roanoke's crappiness. No need to visit. Ever.

Best new experience: Hanging out with my friend's child. Babies rock.

Worst new experience: Having to endure endless jokes that I'm said child's father because of our matching red hair.

Best quote of the year: "Blogs are supposed to be personal, fucker"

Worst quote of the year: "It's mono"

Best thing about 2005: Ending the year with a wondeful person by my side.

Worst thing about 2005: the root canal I endured before our first date.

Happy New Year everyone.

Holiday movie-palooza

Nothing like a long weekend to catch a plethora of movies both in the theater and at home. To be fair, my movie watching actually begin in earnest Thursday night and included the following:

-The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. This film's been getting alot of bad press lately and has topped a few "worst of" lists. Which I think is both incredibly unfair and inaccurate. True, the film is a bit disjointed and seems much more interested in pleasing fans of the original books than making new ones. There were alot of points where I found myself confused, but overall, the mix of british humor and sci-fi storyline made it a fun romp. Sam Rockwell stole the movie with his over the top performance. Worth checking out on cable or renting it.

-Munich. Another victim of unfair press, this time for it's alleged moral equivalence between Israeli assassins and the Munich terrorists. Not a shock that there was controversy over this matter, but anyone who watched this film with an open mind couldn't come away with such a conclusion. The film itself is very well done and Eric Bana's performance was Oscar worthy. Like many films of this ilk, it's about 45 minutes too long and definitely loses steam before wrapping it up quite well at the end. Not sure if it's the best movie of the year, but considering this year's crop has sucked, it may be by default.

-Coach Carter. Lean on Me meets Dangerous Minds meets every down and out sports team movie ever made. And yet, despite it's cliched nature, somehow, it was still fairly entertaining. Samuel L. Jackson definitely lifts this movie above the mediocrity the story weighs it down with, but there are just too many slow moments and unnecessary subplots that could have been to cut to improve the movie's flow. Worth checking out on cable or a rental if you like Jackson or sports movies in general.

-The Family Stone. Stay away from this abomination of a film. From the trailer, it appeared to be a "Meet the Parents" type movie and at times, it does act like that. But there is so much else going on and most of it is more annoying than actually helpful to the plot. None of the characters are particularly likeable and some really serve no purpose in the film at all. Just a huge waste of time unless you enjoy self-important hypocrites shouting down annoying unappealing outsiders.

SNL rips off Family Guy!

Holy crap:

http://www.youtube.com/watch.php?v=YnMTfBBdgGg&search=family%20guy

Transit workers strike blog

http://fuckthetwufuckthemta.blogspot.com/

Overnight

When I first heard about the documentary Overnight, it sounded like a great piece of schadenfraude. After all, there's nothing quite as satisfying as watching a blowhard crash and burn after hitting the jackpot and letting it go to his/her head. The fact that I was in the midst of completing a screenplay myself didn't hurt my interest. A year or so later, I finally got my hands on a copy and watched it this weekend. The basic premise is that Troy Duffy is a Boston native who becomes an LA transplant along with his bandmates, The Brood. He works at a bar off the beaten path from the typical LA scene. He also wrote a screenplay, which gets bought by Miramax called The Boondock Saints. This turns Duffy into a minor celebrity and makes him a classic Hollywood success story. It also turns him into an egomaniacal jerk who is determined to dominate the show business world both in film and music.

It becomes apparent quite quickly that Duffy's behavior rubs alot of people the wrong way and he quickly becomes persona non grata around town. His deal with Miramax faulters, his band gets dumped by Madonna's Maverick records and he is generally treated like pond scum by pretty much everyone. This, of course, doesn't change his belief that he will be the best thing to come out of the business and he proceeeds to continue to ostracize the industry and even his own friends and bandmates.

Eventually, both his film and band's album get produced and neither end up doing much of anything. He attributes his film's failings on Miramax blackballing him. As for his music failings, well, the rest of the world just doesn't get him. After all his successes and failings, he returns to Boston to speak to some film students and proceed to act above them once the engagement is over.

While certainly enjoyable, the fact that the film is produced by two of Duffy's disgruntled friends makes you wonder about the editorialized nature of the product. Clearly, Duffy is a jackass, but you leave the film finding nothing remotely redeeming about him. And there really is no good reason to believe such a person would get any sort of film/music deal in the first place.

Definitely worth a look if you're interested in the biz. I'd advise keeping an open mind on the subject though.

TWU fucks over New Yorkers and other unions

Having survived my first of possibly many $10 cab rides this morning, I can't help but feel nothing but utter contempt for the Transit Workers Union. Not only did they openly deceive their own members about the MTA's offers, but now, they've chosen to shut the transit system down 1) during the busiest time of the year and 2) during 20 degree weather. So in the end, they're fucking over the middle to lower class people to whom 10 bucks each way in a cab is too much money. They've been the really bad guys throughout this whole process and I feel zero pity for them. I do pity those who have to walk through this weather and the other unions who will now be looked at as being similar to these douchebags.

And let's not forget the MTA in all this. They've been providing awful service for quite some time while jacking up the prices. Meanwhile, they've yet to improve anything, haven't started the 2nd Avenue railroad, haven't tried to solve the Rockland County commuting problem (they're gonna build another way for Long Islanders to get directly into the city, but they can't build one for Rockland?) and now, allowed the Union workers to go on strike.

No good guys here.

Musical interlude. Bon Scott, AC/DC and dying ruining your legacy

I've once again begun the lengthy process of listening to my extensive music collection this week, so I naturally began with AC/DC, who make up the begining bookend of my collection. In my time, I've owned five AC/DC albums: Highway to Hell, Back in Black, Blow Up Your Video, The Razor's Edge and AC/DC Live. BUYV and TRE were bought during my musical childhood and though both contain several great songs, neither are considered essential by anyone other than diehard fans. The Live album is essential inasmuch as the band has never come out with a proper greatest hits album. As a stopgap, it does the trick though the fact that Brian Johnson sings all the Bon Scott songs illustrates its key flaw.

Which brings me to my point of discussion, Bon Scott. The unfortunate thing about Mr. Scott (other than being dead and having a song written about him that was mistaken for a pro-suicide song) is that he is essentially irrelevant for both discussions of the band and music in general for anyone who is not a completist. This may seem harsh, but if you look at the empirical evidence, you will see that AC/DC didn't mean anything in the States until Scott died, was replaced by Brian Johnson and Back in Black was released. This isn't to say that the original version of the band did nothing of note: Dirty Deeds done Dirt Cheap, TNT and other Scott era songs are essential parts of the AC/DC catalog. And Highway to Hell is the second best album the band ever released. And therein lies the key problem.

Anyone who is serious about rock music has owned or owns a copy of Back in Black. This is not debateable: it is easily one of the top ten hard rock albums ever and consistently makes any and all lists of the best albums ever. It also reinvented the band from a down on its luck blues infused rock band to a no-nonsense good time rock band. Which is ironic since it's supposed to be a tribute to Scott. In the end, it's more a reinvention and less of tribute.

Scott doesn't have a similar acheivement, though many argue that Highway to Hell is as good if not better. These people are kidding themselves. Had Scott lived, the band would have remained a niche act and never ascended to the level it did. His death let Angus Young step into the spotlight and into pop culture iconography. As for him, he's still mourned by the band's loyal base, but largely forgotten otherwise. Death certainly was not kind-or profitable-for him. Maybe he should have talked to 2Pac.

Randall the Apprentice-and huge asshole

Last night's Apprentice had one of the most shocking endings in recent tv, much less reality tv, history. To recap, the final two, Rebecca and Randall were both quite capable performers throughout the season and had shown their abilities in the face of hardship (Rebecca's broken ankle, Randall's dead grandma. As the finale progressed, it was clear that both did admirable jobs under less than great circumstances and Trump seemed pleased with both of them. Even with most of the former candidates taking Randall's side (and Alla doing her best Ivan Drago impersonation while completely throwing Rebecca under the bus), neither received harsh criticism from Trump. Ultimately, Trump picked Randall and the celebration began, only the make temporarily stopped by the Donald who then suggested he could hire Rebecca as well. He left the decision up to Randall who, in quite a turn of character, flatly rejected the offer, leaving pretty much everyone in a state of shock and disbelief.

So why did Randall screw over Rebecca when he had already won? A few theories:

1) In the heat of the moment, he felt that his victory would have been overshadowed by Rebecca. Possible, but he seems too logical to make a knee jerk reaction.

2) He actually had a personal grudge against Rebecca. In past episodes, Rebecca fought hard to survive and in the heat of the boardroom confrontation, she may have hurt Randall's feelings. Again, possible, but as a person who's been involved in cutthroat scenarios before, you would think he would have a thicker skin. which leads me to my personal belief.

3) Randall simply played us all along. He did and said what people wanted and stayed above the petty squabbles that sank his competitors. In many ways, his actions are similar to how Richard Hatch won Survivor. The only difference is the nature of the game and who has the final say. There's no denying Randall endured himself to Trump and his fellow candidates.

So why screw over Rebecca? Because someone who could be so coniving likely has a need to have the spotlight for themselves. To have an ultimate victory and the limelight for himself. Now, from a business standpoint, what he did was stupid. Rebecca would have certainly been a great addition to the organization and she would have Randall to thank for her position. She would be working in an entirely different area from Randall. So instead of gaining a valuable ally, Randall's selfishness probably created at least one lifetime enemy. Not smart business sense.

I think it's safe to say that the Knicks suck

and frankly, I'm not really that upset about that. Yes, this season will be painful. If the Knicks win 30 games, it'll be a small miracle (they're on a pace to win 24). But this needs to happen. They need to dump all their crappy veterans, trade Marbury and build around Frye (who looks to be about two years from becoming something special). So no KG, no Artest and lord help the Knicks if they even entertain an offer for Frye.

They're in need of a rebuilding. They have been since Ewing left. Let the process begin.

A Hearty "Fuck You"

to the cheap ass, ugly, stupid, shit for brains, should be worm food douchebag hypocrite.

Fuck you. Fuck you and your whole fucking operation. Fuck your wife, fuck your home, fuck your kids, fuck your life.

Fuck YOU!

A few movie reviews

Saw Memoirs of a Geisha on Friday night and was very disappointed in it. The preview made it look alot better than it really was. And that's because visually it's a beautiful film (aren't all movies using Japan or China as a setting beautiful?), but very hollow on the story front. It left alot of questions unanswered and assumed that the viewer was either familiar with the whole story or had actually read the book. Which was not true of me on either front. And the whole relationship between the Chairman and the main character was creepy on so many levels.

-Finally saw Closer after avoiding it for the last year or so. The movie itself isn't anything special, but the scene between Natalie Portman and Clive Owen in the strip club was excellent (for multiple reasons). It still shocks me how good Portman can be when you compare it to the crap she did in the Star Wars prequels. Speaking of crap, Julia Roberts really sucks in this flick. I mean we're talking wretchedly bad acting.

-Lastly, caught "Festival Express" on Showtime yesterday. It's a documentary about a week long train propelled music tour through Canada during 1970 and it features the Dead, Janis Joplin, The Band and others. Some really great footage from the shows, as well as the train ride, which was like a moving party. The inclusion of interview clips from various musicians is a nice added bonus. Certainly not the most noteworthy film, but a great watch for Deadheads and fans of rock films in general.

Just renewed my NetFlix membership, so I anticipate doing alot more of these quick reviews in the coming weeks.

NBC execs must be reading my blog

Granted, I would've thrown Scrubs in the 8:30 slot on Thursdays, but I'll take what I can get:

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/12/02/business/02nbc.html

And Scrubs is doing back to back original episodes! Nice!

Ron Artest-the interview

HBO on Demand has a 20 minute unedited interview with Mr. Artest which was shot for Real Sports. First off, the fact that they are showing this unedited and apart from the original airing is awesome and part of what makes HBO on demand awesome. Not only can you see repeats of your favorite shows, watch movies over and over, but they actually give you great content like this. I wish the other on demand channels followed suit.

Secondly, after listening to the whole thing, it's clear that Artest 1) is in no way remorseful for what happened and 2) is severely mentally scarred from his childhood. I don't think he's a bad person per se, but he's in need of some heavy duty psychoanalsis and therapy. And from the sound of it, he'll never get the help he needs until he finally gets thrown out of the league (and I'm now betting on it happening sooner rather than later) and/or he gets in trouble with the law. It's a compelling interview and very much worth watching. But it's also quite sad.

Blondie?

I haven't really done much posting about music on this blog for a couple of reasons:

1) I've become insanely out of the loop with today's music. I've purchased maybe 7 CDs this year and none of them have been listened to more then 10 times. For a guy, that has 600+ CDs, that says alot. I also don't have the patience to watch MTV or listen to radio since most of the music is either crappy or just the same thing I've heard a million times before.

2) Since music is highly subjective in nature, it's hard to form an opinion beyond "I like X or Y" unless you're really into music. And right now, I'm not really into music.

That being said, I'm a bit puzzled by the inclusion of Blondie in this year's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees. I mean, can you name ten Blondie songs? "Heart of Glass", "Call Me" and the one with the rapping are the only ones I can think of off the top of my head. Is that enough to qualify? Is it just because Debbie Harry was insanely fuckable back in her prime? Did she sleep with every person on the nomination comittee?

At least Sabbath and the Sex Pistols have a lasting effect on heavy metal and punk respectively. Blondie? really?

Bad news for SNL; good news for wrestling fans

Saturday Night's Main Event is coming back to NBC next year:

http://www.wwe.com/inside/news/snmereturns

So instead of playing repeats of SNL, NBC is taking its chances with wrestling again. If this isn't a wake up call to Lorne Michaels to clean house, I really don't what will do the trick.

At least there's hope for the future

Pretty decent win for the Knicks last night over the Bulls. Unlike, say, every loss they've had over the last few years, they actually played best in the 4th quarter and that was the key to their victory.

Since their 0-5 start, they've gone 5-4,which is pretty respectable considering how this team started. They're still not even up to .400 yet, but with a few breaks and continued effort, they may be a sleeper to sneak into the playoffs.

Personally, I'd prefer they NOT make the playoffs, get another lottery pick and start shedding some of their excess baggage (Rose, Taylor, Hardaway). They also need to trade Marbury. He's cursed, no doubt about it. Every team he's played on has improved once he left. Now it's the Knicks turn.